Needle in a Haystack
I’ve spent the last week doing pretty much what I intended to do: bugger all. However, I’m now at the point where I’ll admit that I’m bored. Yep, you heard me, I’m bored. Much as I enjoy sitting about the house all day doing nothing and sitting in the garden when the weather’s nice, I need to be doing something. Anything. And of course, the most productive and practical thing I could be doing would of course be working. I’ve sent some letters and CVs off to various places but still no luck. Apparently ASDA (a supermarket chain) are looking for people so that’s always an option, and they supposedly pay quite well too, so I might pop in and ask for an application form. The thing is, I want someone to phone me up and say “Hey Alex, we love you, why don’t you come and work for us? You don’t have to do anything and we’ll give you shit-loads of money!” Yeah, like that’s gonna happen. So instead, I have to trawl through the local papers and look for something, anything, that suits me. Hell, I’ll do anything that isn’t at a fairground. It’s a thankless life. I keep thinking I should buy a lottery ticket, it’s a 1 in 14,000,000 chance but you never know.

Where do I go from here?
I feel that I’ve reached a cross-roads in my life. I went for a walk on the sand dunes before and I found myself reviewing the last couple of years of my life. I realise that the next 2 years are set for me because I’ve got to finish my degree, but after that I’ll be into the big wide world all on my own. I really don’t know what direction my life is heading in at the moment and I feel quite uncertain about things. I just don’t know if I feel ready to “grow up” and become an adult. I’m 19 now but I feel I’m growing up just a little too fast. I want to be able to just have fun more, not worry about money, just let loose once in a while. Instead, I’m thinking about when my next rent payment goes out and what furniture I’m going to buy for my house.